Chapter 1: The Journey of Solitude

In today's fast-paced world, the ability to find contentment in solitude is invaluable. Recently, I spoke with a friend residing in Birmingham, UK, whose family is in Spain. She moved there to complete her studies, and during a video call, I asked her about her experience living alone. I expressed my understanding of how loneliness can creep in at times. Her response was enlightening and taught me something new.

At first, she admitted to feeling isolated, as if there was no one to share her day with, stroll alongside, or enjoy a movie. Returning home to find everything unchanged—the laundry piling up and dirty dishes in the sink—felt strange. She initially doubted her ability to manage everything: cleaning, shopping, caring for her dog, taking out the trash, and paying bills.

However, after a few days, she discovered a part of herself she had previously overlooked. The feelings of loneliness transformed into a different state of mind—being alone, which is not to be confused with loneliness. It became a journey of self-discovery.

She began to appreciate the small joys that often go unnoticed. Spending time in front of the mirror, nurturing self-love, and embracing her imperfections helped her cultivate a stronger character. Trying on outfits at her leisure, going out when she pleased, and dressing as she wanted instilled a sense of confidence, equipping her to face any challenge.

Managing household bills independently and the freedom to purchase what she desired fostered a sense of personal achievement, reinforcing her independence. She realized she could tackle tasks she once thought beyond her capabilities, like plumbing issues or even basic car maintenance.

Through her journey, she learned that being alone can mean enjoying one's own company.

Chapter 2: The Lessons of Loneliness

This newfound solitude allowed her to explore her limits, abilities, traits, and flaws, revealing just how little she understood herself. She expressed a belief that everyone should experience this phase before fully committing to someone else. After all, one must first learn to love and appreciate oneself before expecting love from another. Understanding our values and abilities can transform our lives into something truly beautiful.

She wrapped up our conversation by emphasizing that many narratives could conclude happily if we first take the time to understand ourselves.

The insights she shared were profound and resonated with me deeply. What are your thoughts on this topic? I welcome your comments, as they serve as a source of learning and foster a sense of community.

© 2022 Misbah Sheikh

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