Embracing Self-Love: A Journey of Growth and Reflection
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Chapter 1: The Realization of What Truly Matters
As I matured, I began to understand that many of the concerns I held in my youth were insignificant. This revelation led to extensive discussions with my therapist, prompting me to consider whether my current anxieties would hold any weight in five, ten, or even twenty years. They likely don't matter much now either; however, I occasionally find myself spiraling into negative self-talk. During these times, I rely on various cognitive strategies to pull myself out of the mental traps that whisper "you're not enough," "you haven't achieved anything," or "you lack what others possess." It's a challenging cycle, yet after a decade of therapy, one of the most valuable lessons I learned came from a friend:
"The most significant upgrade in my life has been surrounding myself with the right people."
Hearing this struck me profoundly, leading me to reflect on the important individuals in my life.
My Family: Celebrating Achievements Together
My cousin recently graduated at the top of her class from West Point, and our entire family gathered from across the US and Asia to celebrate. It was a proud moment for me, as Christie and I share a close bond.
My Friends: Cherished Memories and Support
The amazing friends in my life have witnessed my journey through laughter, tears, weight fluctuations, and the challenges of anxiety and clinical depression. Their unwavering support has been a source of immense gratitude for me.
Traveling to New Places: A Lesson in Gratitude
This all circles back to gratitude. In Western culture, it often feels like I'm endlessly climbing an infinite ladder, where each new rung makes the ones below seem unimportant. Yet, those earlier steps are what propelled me forward. More importantly, I've come to realize that it's acceptable to step off the ladder. Acknowledging that it's okay not to feel okay sometimes is crucial. I strive to appreciate the small joys in life—like being able to call my parents, enjoying the company of friends, loving my job, and finally embracing self-love after forty years of self-discovery. Although I still face challenging days, discussing these moments with my support system, along with practices like therapy, meditation, journaling, and writing, has helped me cultivate a deeper sense of inner peace.
Regardless of where you find yourself on your journey, remember that you can always pause to reflect on the people and experiences that bring you fulfillment. I make it a habit to do this daily, and it's in those tranquil moments that I find joy in being alive and cherish the beautiful memories I've created. I hope you take a moment today to discover something that brings you a smile, as it never fails to uplift my spirit.
Chapter 2: Investing in Myself and Embracing New Adventures
As someone who loves food and travel, I realized I needed to rekindle my passion for cooking and self-care after a lengthy period of neglect, largely influenced by my therapeutic journey. I ultimately decided that the most valuable investment I could make was in my own well-being. For my milestone 40th year, I’ve committed to trying 40 new experiences or revisiting hobbies I had set aside. I’m back in the kitchen, traveling extensively with my family and friends, and finally feel unburdened, ready for new chapters in my life. For the first time in ages, I'm genuinely excited about what lies ahead—not just in the distant future but also in the immediate days to come. Who knows, I might even find myself on an unexpected first date or win the lottery. While the chances of both are slim, life is full of surprises.