# The Alarming Infantilization Crisis in Society Today
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Chapter 1: The Divide Among Friends
Recently, I've observed a concerning trend among my circle of friends. There's a noticeable split between those who have embraced adulthood and those who seem stuck in a state of immaturity.
At 36, I've experienced independent living, launched my own businesses, and taken on the responsibilities of parenting alongside my 27-year-old husband, who also manages his own business and a traditional job. When not working, I find myself busy with home repairs or parenting duties. In essence, I consider myself a functioning adult, and my husband shares this mindset. Unfortunately, a significant portion of our friends does not reflect this level of maturity.
I previously shared insights about Renata, a friend who refuses to grow up, but she's not alone in this. Many individuals I know exhibit various degrees of developmental stagnation. It's striking to realize that today’s children seem less mature compared to when I was their age.
As I converse with fellow parents, a troubling pattern emerges regarding Generation Alpha. The developmental milestones my friends and I achieved at a young age appear to be slipping further away from today's kids.
For instance, during a recent chat with friends who have two children, I was shocked to learn that their 10-year-olds are not permitted to use the microwave or stovetop. When I questioned this, my friends shrugged and replied, “I just don’t think they’re ready yet.”
This incident is just one example among many. Children today are experiencing developmental delays unlike any previous generation. Not only are basic skills like cooking and cleaning being postponed, but even fundamental milestones like potty training are being pushed back.
Statistical data indicates that children are now often not fully toilet trained until they are three years old, a stark contrast to my childhood when it was common for kids to be trained by 12 to 18 months. I recall being astonished to see a kindergarten notice requiring students to be toilet trained—a rarity in my time, where such a situation would have led to bullying.
In my youth, I was the one lagging behind, unable to go out unsupervised until nearly 15, aside from my mall visits. Today, some 18-year-olds still face curfews or require parental permission to step outside. This trend is deeply concerning as it extends beyond mere overprotective parenting.
The delayed milestones are merely the surface of a much deeper issue.
Does anyone else notice adults who are perpetually bailed out by their parents? Or those who struggle with basic life tasks like doing laundry or filing taxes? Perhaps you've encountered adults throwing tantrums when things don’t go their way.
In the dating scene, it’s not uncommon to hear 30-year-old men claim they are “too young to settle down,” as if three decades haven’t provided enough time to determine their life goals.
Ironically, many of these individuals are acutely aware of their shortcomings yet dismiss their lack of maturity with laughter, saying things like, “Oh, I can’t adult today, tee hee!” It’s a troubling reality—America seems to be nurturing a culture of widespread arrested development.
Chapter 2: The Global Perspective
Have you seen the TikToks showcasing Chinese kindergartens? These children engage in activities I once did at their age, such as learning foreign languages, cooking, sewing, and playing complex games. In contrast, American educators often plead with kids to simply color within the lines or refrain from eating glue.
Today, teachers are practically begging parents to potty train their children so they don’t embarrass themselves at school. The alarming truth is that a significant number of American adolescents and young adults are falling behind in essential social skills, literacy, math, and basic life competencies.
Many recent college graduates are ill-equipped to navigate the workforce. This has led to a staggering number of individuals in their 30s who still reside with their parents, unable to maintain stable employment. The consequences of this trend are dire; when their parents retire or pass away, these individuals will find themselves utterly unprepared for life.
The factors contributing to this infantilization of American youth are numerous and complex.
Scaredy Parents
The predominant issue lies in parenting styles. Many American parents exhibit an almost pathological fear of risks, constantly shielding their children from any potential harm.
Concerns about sugar, sharp objects, or failing grades dominate their thoughts. In the past, children learned about fire’s dangers through direct experience. Nowadays, parents attempt to eliminate any risk entirely, inadvertently hindering their children’s ability to develop critical life skills.
I firmly believe that granting children responsibilities fosters their growth. Similarly, new employees often rise to the occasion when given tasks, surprising us with their resourcefulness.
Weaponized Incompetence
A common theme on platforms like Reddit is the phenomenon of students feigning helplessness to escape responsibilities. This "weaponized incompetence" extends beyond the classroom, often seen in adults—especially men—who pretend to be incapable of completing household tasks.
This behavior places the burden on caretakers, who often bear the weight of responsibilities that should be shared. While some may escape the consequences in work settings, this mindset ultimately erodes one's skills over time.
I’ve observed a concerning regression among many men in their 20s and 30s, who revert to teenage behaviors as they avoid adult responsibilities, only to find themselves shocked by the consequences when faced with the realities of life.
The Victim Olympics
An alarming trend is the frequent use of disabilities or traumatic experiences as justifications for poor behavior. While it’s true that some individuals face genuine limitations, others exploit these circumstances to evade accountability.
Our welfare system, which imposes strict income limitations, often encourages individuals to restrict their work hours to qualify for assistance, inadvertently fostering a culture of dependency and helplessness.
This behavior casts a shadow over those who genuinely require support and accommodations.
No Consequences
In summary, we live in a society increasingly reluctant to impose consequences for actions. The absence of accountability fosters immature behaviors, leading to a populace that often resembles children running wild.
Real life does not adjust to accommodate individual feelings or circumstances. Society’s safety nets are eroding, leaving individuals unprepared for the harsh realities of life.
When a significant portion of the population operates at a juvenile level, the implications for society are severe. This is not a sustainable path forward, and we should be sounding alarms before it becomes too late.
